Tag: Suburbia

The readymades on my neighbor’s lawn; or, The ghost of Duchamp alights in North Carolina briefly and is gone.

Mark Sample

The night before trash day in suburbia rarely brings such exciting visions as this Duchampian fountain on my neighbor's curb. A tremendous storm---the first rain in many weeks---had just passed through, and the porcelain sparkled as if some great wet mythic meteorological Tidy Bowl Man had scoured everything clean. In suburbia, on the night before… Continue reading The readymades on my neighbor’s lawn; or, The ghost of Duchamp alights in North Carolina briefly and is gone.

This is a test, this is only a test.

Mark Sample

"The more we rehearse disaster, the safer we'll be from the real thing.....There is no substitute for a planned simulation." So says a character in Don DeLillo's 1985 novel White Noise, as a midwestern town is overrun by men in Mylar suits, conducting a simulated evacuation from some vague chemical disaster. Yesterday we had out… Continue reading This is a test, this is only a test.

If you’re a terrorist and you’re reading this, then the terrorists have already won.

Mark Sample

I just can't leave the nuclear power plant in my backyard alone. I recently discovered a site from the Eyeball Series that lists formerly public FEMA information about McGuire Nuclear Power Station, information which was taken offline in the aftermath of 9/11. The Eyeball site faithfully reproduces the FEMA information, which, according to what I've… Continue reading If you’re a terrorist and you’re reading this, then the terrorists have already won.

Suburbia: The Unspeakable Peril in the Everyday

Mark Sample

All this thinking about the dangers of suburbia reminds me of a passage from Joan Didion's great 1970 novel Play It As It Lays. Maria Wyeth, the washed-up, strung-out actress in the novel exists in a near catatonic state. For days during the rain she did not speak out loud or read a newspaper. She… Continue reading Suburbia: The Unspeakable Peril in the Everyday

Warning!! Playground Jungle Gym!!

Mark Sample

Playground Jungle Gym (Larger Image) Posted to Flickr by samplereality. Continuing my series of posts on Danger in Suburbia, I want to highlight another lurking horror on the playground in my subdivision. Here is a sturdy metal and PVC slide/tunnel jungle gym, with a warning sticker posted in several places on the equipment: "Warning: Installation...may… Continue reading Warning!! Playground Jungle Gym!!

Warning!! Playground Swing Seat

Mark Sample

Playground Swing Seat (Larger Image) Posted to Flickr by samplereality. There's a playground around the corner in my subdivision, and it's loaded with warning signs. There's even one on the toddler swing seat, alerting all who read that "improper installation, maintenance, use, or vandalism can damage seat and lead to serious injury." What I find… Continue reading Warning!! Playground Swing Seat

Warning! Better Lawns through Chemistry

Mark Sample

Lawn Doctor (Larger Image) Posted to Flickr by samplereality. Here's a sign in the front yard of a house in my subdivision. The "Lawn Doctor" has been there, doing whatever it takes to make the grass green, green, green. What's with the blue thumb? Instead of signaling competence with gardening (a green thumb) it's as… Continue reading Warning! Better Lawns through Chemistry

Update on Burglary

Mark Sample1 Comment

First the facts...the word floating around town was that there were over thirty break-ins over the holidays. The police have announced that there have actually only been twenty-four reported break-ins. So already I feel safer. (So already I feel safer?) Other facts: mostly jewelry was stolen. Yes, some Oreos. And in one case, seven bars… Continue reading Update on Burglary